8 Observations in the Oppressing Heat

Heat indices are breaking records at 120.  Dew points are also breaking records in the 80s.  (That's higher than the Amazon jungle, by the way.)  And regular temperatures are just as impressive.  My computer is located on the front porch of our home.  Normally the most serene and inspiring place in our house.  But lately it's been known as the only place without air conditioning.  So with sweat beading my upper lip and the hazy air blurring my sight and my thoughts, here's a quick and dirty on the hot and schweaty.

1.  Lucy is crab.  Is she a girl?  Is she a second-born?  Is she two?  Is it the heat?  It's really hard to say.  But she has been dealing out some major meltdowns lately.  Of course as soon as she gets that out of the way she bounces back up and does the cutest thing you've ever seen from a two-year-old in your whole life.  And that just totally sums up Lucy.

2.  Carrying around another human being 24 hours a day in this sweltering heat is just as hot as it literally sounds.  I'm speaking, of course, about being pregnant in the summer.  There are some positives.  Like the summer maternity clothes are way cuter and wearing minimal clothing (or just opting out completely) with an expanding belly is comfortable in more ways than one.

3.  The heat makes no difference to William.  "But Mommy, why can't I go ride my bike?"  I'll tell you why.  Because if I let him go out there I'll never get him back in.  Until, of course, I'm picking up his listless body to driving him to the ER for heat stroke because he hasn't figured out when to say when.  Thirty below and he wants to go sledding.  One hundred and twenty and he wants to run races.  Are all boys like this?

4.  T-ball is my new hell on earth.  I don't mind going to t-ball.  I don't mind watching t-ball.  But bringing Lucy and trying to tell her she can't play t-ball with the big kids for one hour is excruciating.  Add in the heat and I think I might explode.  First she runs on the field.  Then I warn her.  Then I chase her.  Then I hold [read: trap] her in my arms.  Then she screams.  Then people stare.  Then I sing her a song.  Then she's distracted for a whole 30 seconds.  Then I give her a cracker.  Then I give her my phone.  Then she makes a call to India.  Then I take the phone away.  Then she screams.  Then people stare.  Then I look at my watch.  Fifty minutes left.

You follow me?  I loathe t-ball.

5.  I don't mean to go all Negative Nellie on you.  It's just that when we were experiencing the worst winter ever I didn't think I'd be living a similar life style in the middle of July.  Having to be quarantined when the sun is shining brilliantly through our windows is confusing.  And it feels like my summer glory days are slipping right through my fingers.  I can hear the clock tick tocking down and there's nothing I can do about it except pout.

But it's not all bad, I guess.  Like...

6.  All the back pain I've been experiencing this pregnancy is completely gone.  Thanks, I think, to the high humidity.  My skin is also vibrant and supple with all the water in the air.  Is this why old people move to Florida?

7.  My laundry pile is at record-level lows.  Not because I'm so on top of it but because the kids aren't generally wearing more than their skivvies all day long.

8.  Many things become "optional" in high heat.  To name a few: makeup, showers, anything except a ponytail for a hair do, dinner, clothes, calorie counting, bed sheets and exercise.  What am I forgetting?