Perspective

When William was two and Lucy was a baby, my friends Amy and Dona also had two kids those same ages.  The only difference was that Dona's oldest was a girl while Amy and I both had boys.

In the midst of trying to navigate the new waters of having a toddler and a baby under one roof, I once asked the ladies when they showered during the day and what they did with the kids during that time.  Dona told us she put her baby son on her bed while her two-year-old daughter played with him.  Both Amy and I struggled to pick our jaws up from the floor.  Dona had no idea why we were in such shock.

"Dona," I said, "If I ever did that, William would unintentionally kill Lucy."

"Yes," agreed Amy, "So would Jack."

And as horrid as that sounds I think it was true.  A two-year-old boy and a two-year-old girl are two completely different species.  While William was a sweet, sweet toddler he was rather rough with Baby Lucy.  I really believe he thought she was his own pin cushion/monster truck/board to hammer come to life.

So I smiled to myself the other day when I jumped in the shower at 4 p.m.  Don't judge.  Four O'Clock is so totally a normal time to take a shower.

While I was showering all three of the kids were awake.  Lucy was watching Little Einsteins and just below the television was Katherine on her floor mat playing with William, who informed me that Little Einsteins was only for babies.  Nobody was crying.  Nobody was screaming.  Nobody was fighting.

I was reminded of that conversation with Dona and Amy a couple of years earlier because here I was in a completely opposite frame of mind.  The worry that Katherine might get hurt by the older children never even crossed my mind.  In fact, I was so confident I didn't even feel rushed and actually made time to shave my legs.

This little anecdote is the great reminder to me, and maybe to you too, of what my mom always told me: This too, shall pass.

The baby doesn't sleep through the night.  Not even close.  Lucy screams.  All the time.  William has difficulty following directions.  Especially when we're in a hurry.

But these are challenges of their ages and stages.  The challenge will pass and a new one will take its place.  Ever the revolving door.

It also reminds me of when William tells me I'm the best mom in the world and he still wants to snuggle up on the couch with me.  It reminds me of sweet open kisses from the baby and how she always lights up when I walk into her room and never ever talks back.  It reminds me of when Lucy pronounces all her "sp" words with an "f" so we make her say "sparten" so we can hear her say "farten" and all have a good laugh.

These things, too, shall pass.

It's never all good.  But it's never all bad either.  Rather, it's all in how you look at it.

7 Quick Takes [2.24.12]

1.  Hello?  Is anyone out there?  I blog.  I'm a blogger.  Except sometimes I don't.  And sometimes I'm not.  Don't hate me.

It's frustrating to me, as a writer, because I don't ever not blog for lack of ideas.  It's always for lack of time and energy.  I see great people getting their pieces published or recognized and I know I could really do something with this little space.  I hear people talk about this blog or that blog or the latest thing they repinned on Pinterest and I so badly want to be there.  To the mom with eight kids who homeschools and makes her own yogurt and uses cloth diapers and looks stunning and publishes seven well-written blog posts a week: How do you do it?  Come 8 o'clock and I am checked out!

2.  I had good intentions of writing a blog post yesterday all about how we've come to a good place in this little family of ours.  Things are running smoothly and I can mostly figure things out without have a full-fledged panic attack.  But then William did something to make me so angry that I sent him to his room without lunch.  I've never done that before.  So I wasn't feeling all high and mighty about myself anymore and thus that whole blog idea fizzled fast.  Kids are the world's best humblers.

3.  Katherine turned four months yesterday.  Can you even believe it?!  I look at her little body and while she is still my teeny baby, I know deep down hers is not the body of a newborn any longer. Sniff, sniff.  She "talks" all the time now.  She rarely cries.  Instead she'll start squawking if she's upset.  She eats like a maniac and the only time she cries really loud is when she's starving.  She's a pro at grabbing for her toys.  She even grabbed her nukie and put it in her mouth all by herself yesterday.  She loves to play by herself.  If you lay her down she cranes her neck to try to sit up.  She stands up when hanging on to my index fingers.  I think she thinks she's twice her actual age.  She still has crazy hair that has not yet started to fall out.  She smiles easily but makes you work hard for a giggle.  She loves William best of all.  Even though he makes me the angriest of all and has to get sent to his room without lunch.

4.  Lent started this week and while I don't always share the things I'm doing for Lent I'll let you know that this year I gave up treats after dinner.  For 90% of the day I'm a very healthy eater.  But as soon as 7 or 8 o'clock hits, I'm jonesin for some chocolate or ice cream.  It is my weakness.  So I'm giving it up for 40 days save for my birthday which always fall during Lent which I've deemed unfair and thus I allow myself to cheat.  I was unsure about this initially because selfishly I'm hoping it will help me kick those last few baby pounds I've got hanging around my mid section.  Is that a shallow reason? I wonder.  But if I do lose the weight, I'll feel better about myself and when I feel good, my mood feels good and a good mood mom is a good for everyone.

5.  Brian thought he might give up coffee for Lent.  I quickly talked him out of going down that dangerous road.  Would you give up water?  Or breathing?  Then you shouldn't give up coffee.  We have three kids five and under.  Coffee isn't a pleasure.  It's a necessity.  Funny how when I suggested he give up alcohol he quickly put that idea to rest.  Maybe for the same logic I used on coffee.

6.  Remember my room makeover pictures a few months back? I still owe you two more rooms.  The living room is complete and we're almost done with our master bedroom.  It has turned out rather lovely.  We have new blinds to install and I need to buy a headboard for our bed.  When we moved from our townhouse to our current home we actually downgraded our master bedroom.  It's much smaller and I really miss the walk-in closet.  But that's the trade-off between a house built in 1997 and one built in 1923.  What we lost in space we gained in character.

7.  I bought an Ergo Baby Carrier!  If you already own one you will know what a big deal this is.  You'll also know what an investment it is.  They are not cheap.  It is one of three baby products I've spent more than $100 on.  The other two are my Phil and Ted's double stroller (LOVE!) and my breast pump.  Technically my breast pump doesn't count because insurance paid for almost all of it when William was in the NICU.  But I would have forked over my own money if need be.  I know a lot of women who would disagree with me on the matter of the breast pump but I've found it to come in handy many times even though I'm a stay-at-home mom.

Back to the Ergo. My sister-in-law was in town from New York last week and she let me try hers out.  I now totally understand what all the fuss was about.  I decided to get the Sport instead of the Original and most moms I've talked to tell me this was a good decision.  Thoughts?  My Ergo hasn't arrived yet but don't think I'm not tracking that package every morning!

Fresh From the Bath

Brian said I need a blogger intervention. Until then I'll just keep posting pictures and pretend I'm a real blogger.  This picture totally captures my children's personalities.  Like, to a tee.

P.S. When I looked at the screen on my camera I totally thought Katherine was smiling. But now that I'm looking at it full screen I see that she's still unsure about her older siblings. What can we do to win you over, Miss Kate?

Captionless

I just recently found this picture when I was purusing through Christmas photos that have long been forgotten.  It says so many things, don't you think?  And it feels like it should be a poster for something.  Not sure what.  But something.

Fun With The Baby

When does the baby stop being referred to as "The Baby" and start being called by her given name?

I don't know but I hope not soon because that would mean she's getting old.

I can barely remember calling William or Lucy "The Baby."  But I know I did.  And now they're "Luce" or "Lucenberg" (don't ask) and "WILLIAM!" or "Hamster" (don't ask on that one either.)

This little lady has brought so much joy in our little family.  You absolutely positively cannot say you've had a bad day when she looks into your eyes and gives you a giant, gummy, drool-y grin.  I dare you to try.

And having a five-year-old this go round has been a pleasant surprise of wonderfulness.  He's so patient with her and mostly gentle.  He is boy after all so there's only so much he can do when it comes to being gentle.  He begs to hold her.  He calms her when she cries.  He offers her his face for inspection as seen above and never flinches or cries out or gets mad when she scratches him or pulls too hard as I know she does.  I'm a little sad William will never have a brother who is close to him in age.  But I think God knew what he was doing when he gave him these little sisters.